Encore Presentation: Minnesotans for Global Warming

From Eric Dondero:

Yes, I know. This is from last year. But with the East Coast covered in one of the worst blizzards of the decade, and Ireland having set a record for the coldest day ever in history, it seems mighty appropriate.

As for Minnesota? Well, they're still waiting for all that Global Warming to arrive.

Enjoy!

How is Global Warming treating you?

Special Guest Post: From Turtle MacBride

It’s one thing for the climatologists to say that Global Warming will cause the oceans to rise, endanger the polar bear, usher-in category 3 or above tropical storms, and destroy the economy. It’s another thing for Global Warming to cause the roof of the Minnesota Metrodome to collapse and force an NFL game to be re-scheduled. Now, we’re talking football!

How does Global Warming cause the Metrodome to collapse? By causing an early snowstorm. Global Warming is like that. It causes warming, cooling, increased variation of temperature and decreased variation. As scientific theories go, it’s bullet-proof. It’s consistent with any development. And, if any predicted catastrophe fails to materialize, no problem, a new prediction will replace it. If the polar bears aren’t endangered, don’t worry about that any more, we’ve got the price of corn rising. And, if one awful season of tropical storms isn’t followed by another, a massive oil spill will take the place of tropical storm activity.

Just remember this: Gaya, the earth god, is angry at us. This is evident in the well-documented rise in earthquake and volcanic activity over the past several hundred years. From the day that George Stephenson invented the railroad locomotive, the Gaya knew we humans were going to unlock the carbon she had labored to sequester in the forms of coal and oil. She knew what was going to happen and expressed her displeasure in the only way she could; but, did we listen?

Same thing with Ra, the sun god, majestic in his daily commute across our sky. His followers dutifully note the pattern of dark areas or “sun spots” on his surface. Their recordings reveal an eleven-year pattern. But, from time to time, there are no sun spots. The last prolonged period of no sun spot activity was followed by the Little Ice Age. Although the Little Ice Age was once denied by the climatologists, because it is no longer denied, we can now ask why Ra was angry at us. And, what are we to make of the current lack of sun spot activity?

Which brings me to the recent gathering of the U.N. climate people at Cancun, Mexico, and the last remaining controversy of climate science: how much the rich nations of the world have to give to the poor nations. Never mind that the biggest emitters of greenhouse gases are not the rich nations, but are the middle-income nations, like China, India and Brazil. Apparently, the rich nations have to make the payments for the same reason that Willie Sutton robs banks, because “That’s where the money is.”

And, don’t you just love how sanctimonious are the leaders of the poor nations, always with their hands out, never getting about the business of reforming their economies so their people can enjoy the kind of economic growth being enjoyed by the middle-income nations of the world. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, President of Iran, says we’re immoral for having such a vibrant economy and complains that we don’t give enough to the poor. Isn’t that like a born-again pimp slapping his prostitute for not coming across enough money, while criticizing her for the way she earns it?

It all goes back to the first Star Trek movie, doesn’t it? “Vger” has returned and is going to cleanse the earth of the carbon-based units.

Captain Kirk, where are you now that we really need you?